Underneath

Posted on March 4, 2015 by janehwilson

Underneath

Are my daffodils
Under the snow?

Will my hyacinths
Make a scentful showing?

What are my crocuses
Pondering down there

Under this deep white
Coverlet?

JEHW
March 1, 2015

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Melting

Posted on February 24, 2015 by janehwilson

Melting

Snow begins to melt in the wetlands –-
Great lungs of the lake

A paint-by-numbers puzzle painting
Of color and sensation

Snow, white against milky butterscotch water
Edged in icy silver

Charcoal and chocolate textured tree trunks
Some crawling with mossy green lichen

And among all this –-
Flickering and flitting low to the ground

A flock of them –- no a veritable hoard
Red bellies, white fannies flashing about

Robins
Those harbingers of spring

JEHW
Late February 2015

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The Ladies of the Guild

Posted on February 17, 2015 by janehwilson

The Ladies of the Guild

They know all the rules
The customs
The graces

They can fuss over details
Like nobody’s business
Mores you never knew existed

What season
Which cloth
Who gave it
And why

What happened to
The leftover wine
Whose lipstick
Messed up the chalice

You would think them
A buttoned up bunch
But then there are the flowers

The elegant
The poignant
The perfect flowers
And when you see those

You know
That enchantment blazes
Deep in their souls

JEHW
February, 2015

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The Cookies – A Valentine Fantasy

Posted on February 7, 2015 by janehwilson

The Cookies
A Valentine Fantasy

Would the world
Dissolve into chaos
If I stopped everything
And made the cookies?

It could be fun.

The lovely sticking dough —
Like mud pies of old —
Rolling around the counter,
Making a mess.

It might feel like I was playing

The heart shaped cutters,
The splashy red food coloring,
The yummy pink frosting
That goes in the middle
Of the two cinnamony,
Gingery shortbreads.

What if I actually giggled?

My pristine kitchen
Turned upside down
My rigorous discipline
Sent packing.

How long could I manage such joyfulness?

I would have to eat
A goodly number,
And let him eat some too
Without saying a word about
How many were missing.

What if he actually laughed?

But we can’t
Eat all of them.
Our carefully managed
Tummies would hurt.

It could be a game.

We must give them away
But who shall get them?

Well there is sweet Nattie in Philly.
She is an absolute must.
So many times we have
Made them together.

We could pack them up with fancy bows!

No way to send them to sweet Lindsay
On that boat in the middle
Of the glimmering sea.
That ocean is its own
Playful Valentine for her.

My heart might let go of so many things.

We will take them to dear ones
Who could use a smile in their lives.

I know!

We can send them with him
To the office – a token —
A gift —
To lift the cold winter gloom.

I think I’ll make the cookies.

February 4, 2014
JEHW

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Imbolc

Posted on January 31, 2015 by janehwilson

Imbolc

Thirteen degrees
Making itself felt
Pouring through the
Window panes
Stopping me cold
In my tracks

Lonely hammock
Sits on the porch
Longing for a
Lazy lollygagger

A stack of good books
A cool glass of tea

Midwinter just two days away
Catches me dreaming
Of warmer days

JEHW
January 31, 2015

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Dementia 2 – Love Stories

Posted on January 3, 2015 by janehwilson

Dementia 2 – Love Stories

Love Story 1

His fire is fading
He tires easily
His feet betray him

He can’t remember
People
Words
Why we will no longer
Allow him to drive

But he can still give
Great big hugs
And sloppy kisses

And he can still
Tell me he loves me
In is chocolaty rich
Deep dark voice

These things he does
Every time

Every time I see him

They are the extravagance
The legacy
The security of my father’s
Gifts to me

It’s no wonder I can’t resist them.

Love Story 2

Sisters
Why don’t you come?

You have to come!

For the “I love you”s,
For the hugs,
And the kisses.

Do you not understand this?
Do you not grasp their richness?
How will you miss them
When they are gone
If you are not here today?

Am I to suffer this joy alone?

With whom will I share these
Vestiges of our father’s love
When they are no longer
Feelable,
No longer hearable,

But only glimmers
In the heart
To hold on to him by?

JEHW
January 3, 2015

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Good Morning

Posted on December 9, 2014 by janehwilson

Good Morning

I considered staying in this morning,
What with the autumnal chill
And the drizzly, mistiness.

And people all around me staring down the darkness —
A heart gone a flutter,
A cancer revealing its fangs,
A precious mind all a scramble.

It seemed a good day to take a break from the outside world.

But my coat was on, my cup of tea in hand,
And out I went.

I found the forest so quiet now
In its duo-chrome greys and browns —
A penetrating comfort somehow.

There, on the wooden bridge
I merged with the out of doors.

Squirrel was about,
Scampering along the railing.
She is becoming used to me now,
Even touchingly curious.

I rested. I prayed. I emptied my cares,
Drinking in this coming winter.

Then, just as I was turning to leave,
Bald eagle rounded the bend.

Easing into the cove,
She dipped an understanding wing
And flew off on her way.

Leaving me nourished
For the coming day.

JEHW
December 9,2014

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A Winter Story

Posted on December 1, 2014 by janehwilson

A Winter Story

Before God had a name,
We celebrated the Winter Solstice.

We lit fires, and gathered greens,
And we danced and we sang.
We even drew pictures of flowers
And gave them as gifts to one another.

Even then we understood –
In our very humanness —
The need for the darkness –
The time for rest and gathering in –

As well as the joy of turning into the light –
The flowering and rebirth –
The coming of all things sunny.

Before the word was made flesh
And dwelt among us, we knew.
It’s just that some of us needed
Fleshy things
Standing right in front of
Our eyes
In order to believe.

And fortunately, very fortunately
God knew that too.

JEHW
November 22, 2014

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Dementia 1 – The Phone

Posted on November 22, 2014 by janehwilson

My father is slipping into to dementia. My mother is riddled with arthritis. They are terribly vulnerable and I am their primary caregiver. My husband’s parents are aging too. It is fair to say that this is turning our lives upside down.

For me, writing is sometimes my salvation. So, today I am starting a page simply called Dementia – partly because sometimes I feel like I am the one with dementia. I hope it will help others who are in this place. Perhaps, eventually it will become a collection.


The Phone

He has lost his phone
He is afraid to tell me
He tells my sister though

I meet his eye
“Daddy, have you lost your phone?”
“I have.”

Beautiful blue eyes fill with tears
And so do mine.

“It happens to the best of us,”
I manage to say

And he is the best of us.

JEHW
November 20, 2014

Posted in Alzheimer's, Dementia, Poetry | Tagged , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Welcome Sound

Posted on November 18, 2014 by janehwilson

Welcome Sound

Sound of water
Sound of life
Running from one
Once parched pool
To another

JEHW
November 18, 2014

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